Springsteen's "The Streets of Philadelphia" seemed appropriate after this weekend...
I've been in three states and slept in six different places in the last three days: Three buses, one church pew, one park bench and -- at last -- my mattress in DC.
So as you can imagine, this last weekend was one of the most eventful ones of my life. It's amazing what you can do when you don't sleep. I might as well put some evidence down here that it actually happened before I forget the details. In fact, it was so eventful that I have forgotten what happened in my life the entire week before, so I'm going to start with Friday.
First, I went out to the National Press Club after work on Friday night and had a couple drinks with Kaitlynn and her friend Nick. It was her last day at work, and we figured, what the heck. It was a normal enough evening until we collaborated and agreed that it would be really fun to buy somebody a drink from across the room. I mean, you have to make a fool of yourself every now and then, right? Well, just about everyone was a lot older, and we figured it would either look like we were mocking them, or it would just end badly... so we were about to give up when we noticed a girl about our age talking on the phone at a table by herself. We sent her a margarita, and it actually went better than any of us expected because she came over and ended up being an intern herself and was actually pretty cool.
When she left, I got to talk to Kaitlynn and Nick's friend, Francis, who is a 50-something Chinaman who gave us draft copies of the next chapter of the book he is writing. He asked us to proof-read it. He seemed like a nice enough guy, and I got to practice my five Chinese phrases. But the book is called "Kicked in the Balls Management," by Francis Hsu. No joke. The chapter he gave me to read starts like this: "You are flying a twin-engine 767 aircraft. The weather is perfect, no clouds, light winds, visibility unlimited." That's as far as I got so far. Maybe I'll read more later, Francis. Kicked in the balls. Yep.
After the Press Club, I went home and made sandwiches to last me the weekend -- 10 sandwiches made from thin-sliced steak and chicken sandwich wafers, cheap hamburger buns and ketchup. Then at 1 a.m. on Friday night I headed down to Chinatown and hopped on a bus for New York City.
The bus left at 3:30 a.m., but there were no empty seats, surprisingly. I got to use more Chinese: I told the guy in front of me, "Me guan xi," (That's alright) when he put his seat back and then apologized.
NEW YORK CITY
I slept until about 7 a.m. on the bus (sleeping venue #1). That's when we pulled into Chinatown NYC, which is on the southern end of Manhattan. Basically the bus just pulled up to the side of the street and everybody got off, so I started walking around until I spotted the Chrysler Building in the distance and mistook it for the Empire State Building, so I started walking that way.
After about a half-hour, I ran into some people who had a map and were asking ME where the nearest Metro stop was. I told them I didn't know, and then I asked them if we were really on Manhattan Island. The look they gave me told me all I needed to know, and I kept walking until I found a store that would sell me a map of my own.
Seems like just about everyone 40 and older does aerobics and martial arts and fan-dancing on the tennis courts at 7 a.m. on weekends. I got some pictures that I'll put up when I get back.
I think I walked about 35 miles total this weekend in Manhattan and then in Philadelphia, and my feet and calves still make it hard to walk without limping. :(
I wandered through Times Square and Central Park, and met some interesting characters on the streets. They even had a farmer's market at Union Square. At one point I turned around and there was this huge, disheveled black guy smiling about 5 inches from my face. I looked down to see what he was so amused about and he was holding out his hand. Of course I shook it, and then he started rapping about what his name was and how he needed a couple bucks for food. I reached into my bag, and he got a little excited, but then I gave him my last two sandwiches, and he looked pretty disappointed. I have to admit, those sandwiches probably didn't taste that good.
There was something happening on every block, including two guys on the sidewalk in a side street -- one in a wheelchair -- beating the crap out of a piece of scrap metal with an axe. Yeah, and axe, like you'd find on a farm, but in downtown New York. It looked like they were trying to straighten it or something...
Once I had walked for about four hours, I gave Sara Thompson a call. For those of you who don't know Sara, she was an editor on the Western Front with me, and she has an internship in New York this summer. So we hung out and ate Middle Eastern food from a tiny little hole of a place, that was most likely a front for a drug-dealing business. When we got to the seating area down a long hallway in the back of the place, we noticed everything was metal, and I looked at Sara and said, "This is the kind of place where you could get whacked and nobody would ever know..." I still think we got off lucky...
Well, we wandered around some more, went to Mass at St. Patrick's Cathedral, saw the park bench that opens the movie "The 25th Hour" with Edward Norton, and went to the site of the WTC.
Then we had a beer, and I hiked it back to Chinatown to catch the 11 p.m. bus to Philadelphia. All in one day...
PHILADELPHIA
It's a good thing I got to my bus stop an hour early, because the bus left about 3 minutes after I got on. I had two seats to myself this time, so I slept the full two hours into Philly (sleeping venue #2). Then I woke up just before midnight when the bus pulled in with sharp pains in my legs and feet from all the walking the day before... I got off on another strange street and walked around midtown Philly (not the best place) for an hour until I found a bar.
The only way I can describe downtown Philly at night is that it's exactly like Gotham City (from the Batman comics/movies), only it's real.
Walking up 13th Street at about 12:45 a.m. between Locust and Walnut streets was about as classy as it sounds. One dumpster bore the prophetic message, "I'm Death."
As I was walking, I found St. John's Catholic Church, which is where Venerable John Henry Cardinal Newman served as pastor for a while, and where Saint Katherine Drexel was baptized and received her vocation to serve Philadelphia's poor.
I talked to Demis, a homeless guy who was sitting in front of the church, and he asked me if I prayed. Then he told me it doesn't work for him when he prays, but it works when other people pray for him. He said he told somebody else that once and they told him he probably didn't pray enough. He said they were probably right.
So say a prayer for Demis, please.
I told Demis I was staying with friends and then left after a while and walked around until I found that bar, Fergie's Tavern. I took a seat and ordered their cheapest beer, then "washed" my face in the "bathroom" and sat there sipping on the "beer" until they closed at 2 a.m.
Then I walked around for another hour. I saw about 20 homeless people on mattresses under an overhang on one side of a Big K-mart, and I saw about five or six groups of what I would describe as "gang-like persons" walking around. I took a couple pictures of some interesting things, but I figured flashing my expensive camera around wasn't the best idea, so mostly I just took notes.
At about 3 a.m. I decided to get some sleep because my legs were tired, and the nap I had on the bus was wearing off. So I found a bench on the opposite side of the Big K-mart that only had one other person sleeping nearby, and I used my messenger bag as a pillow (sleeping venue #3).
Just about every 5 minutes, a car or motorcycle would rev up its engines nearby, or some group of guys would walk by talking loudly, so it was tough getting to sleep, but I still didn't have any clue where I was in Philly, so I didn't want to keep wandering.
At one point, three guys walked right into the plaza I was in and one started saying something like, "Ah, is this (guy) sleeping on my homeboy's bench?" So I started getting a little nervous and opened my eyes so they knew I was awake. One of his friends convinced him to leave, I think.
Then I met Mary. Mary was a young (I think) black woman who walked right by me and then stuck her whole upper body into the garbage can about 15 feet from where I was sleeping. She was barefoot and had a white rag tied around her head. When she came out of the trash can, I held up the last of the food I had brought -- a package of Fig Newtons -- and waved for her to take them. She said, "For me? Well thanks. You know, Fig Newtons are good, because they have figs in them. The figs are right inside. So they're healthy, but you don't want to eat this many all at once (holding up the whole package of about 20), because it will loosen your stool!"
Thanks Mary.
I asked Mary if she minded me sleeping there, and she told me it was fine because the guard at the K-mart didn't care and we just had to be awake in the morning. I tried to get some more sleep, and I think Mary slept on a bench about 20 feet away to keep an eye on me. I think she knew I didn't exactly belong, so she was my guardian angel for the night.
Saturday night was the only time I've been cold since coming to the East Coast. I woke up three or four times that night shivering, even though I was wearing jeans. Any other time this summer, in my bed in DC, I would have loved a cool night...
It was light out when I woke up 3 hours later to Mary tugging on my pant leg and asking me where my shoes were.
"They're right here beside me," I said. "I took them off last night to let my socks air out."
She said she was keeping an eye on me the night before, and we should probably get up because the guard would come out soon, so I started to get the sleep out of my eyes. Then before I left I offered her two dollars and told her thanks for keeping an eye on me. Mary proceeded to quiz me about Abraham, Issac and Jacob from the Bible and about the circumstances under which each of them received God's blessing.
I didn't do too bad, either; better than Mary thought I would, I think.
What a great person. I should have bought her shoes and a hotel room for the night, but I just said thanks and went down the street to breakfast. She hugged me and kissed me on the neck like they do in the South.
My breakfast was eight dollars, and that really made me think about my priorities. Mary is somebody's sister and somebody's daughter, and the same God I love is madly in love with Mary, but I didn't even invite her to breakfast. It didn't even cross my mind. Asshole. I hope no one treats my loved ones as badly as I treat God's loved ones.
Well, I ate and "washed" my face in the "diner" again. Then I went back to St. John's Church and fell asleep in the pew trying to pray a rosary before Mass (sleeping venue #4). Mass was good. A really vibrant, young Franciscan priest with a shaved head and a goatee. I would have been surprised if he didn't have old prison tats from a former life of crime under those vestments -- one of those type of priests.
That afternoon, I was the tourist and saw Independence Hall, where the Declaration of Independence was signed. I saw Ben Franklin's grave, St. Joseph Catholic Church (oldest in Philly: 1733), and I ate a Philly cheesesteak from a street vendor and drank a beer from the City Tavern that was the same recipe as Thomas Jefferson brewed back in the day.
I walked into downtown again and saw a guy in a wheelchair who was playing music and singing into a microphone. You could hear him clearly for 2 blocks, no joke, but he had a good voice, and he was singing some nice soul music, so no one seemed to mind.
And who do you think was dancing her heart out while sitting on a garbage can near the wheelchair singer? Yep, it was Mary. So I said hi, and told her I was heading out of town and thanks again for keeping an eye on me, and she said, "Hey!" and accidentally spat most of what she was eating at me. Then she kissed me again on the neck and said good bye. I managed to wait until she couldn't see before I wiped my neck...
Then I caught the 5 p.m. bus back to DC and met a French teacher from England who was visiting New York, Philadelphia and DC via the Chinatown bus system as well. I tried to carry on a conversation, but I kept falling asleep and bumping into her, then apologizing and promptly doing the same thing again (sleeping venue #5). Embarrassing.
When I got in to DC, I showered, shaved, shat, and then felt guilty that Mary and Demis and John and all the other folks I met that weekend were staking out park benches so they could sleep in their own filth again while I was making plans to travel back across the country. (sleeping venue #6).
I'm still exhausted from this weekend. I can't believe tomorrow's my last day of work! Hopefully I'll see you all soon.
Take care and God bless,
Jacob